Being 14 is confusing as I said because my meat is
melting, my bones are already creaking, my eyes are already fading.
And not to mention that I don’t know when I need to wash my hair, for what
event yes and for what event no and I also don’t understand why shampoo must sting
my eyes so badly.
It would be much more simpler if I knew exactly what I am feeling, so
am I the hair getting dragged down the shower sewer or I am the shower sewer filled with
gray hairs?
In the end it doesn’t matter, I am probably the water, flowing through it
I am fine because I cannot burn myself even if I am seething.
I wish for you to tell me if I should love you for turning the tap on or if I should hate you for
leaving it so.
I could have been a river flowing with life but I don’t even know what type of water I am,
what kind of fish can live here, through all of these hairs?
I am sorry, I won’t ask any more childish questions from now on, because I am grown up.
Yes, how foolish of me to not realize I am the human, in control of the hair and of the water and of the sewer and of the fish.
I stand in the shower and I watch the water curl around my toes, I watch my hairs falling out
of place and when I pick them up they stick on my fingers.
I dip my head in the hot water and my acne bursts open, little, small patches of a hair orchard.
I do not wish to raise uptight back to the cold air but I do not like the feeling
of my very own hair being not anymore mine, sticking everywhere on my body.
I gulp the air and I get out and I bring a towel around myself, scrubbing until the skin reveals
molten meat and bones that could as well be made of hair.
I lose myself in the sensation of being peeled away, of not existing and I close my eyes,
letting my guard down.
I wake up covered in hair and I am going down and I am drowning. I am finally clean.
Maria Mihalea is a fifteen year old writer who spends half of her time reading, and the other half reading with her younger brother. She likes to think that she is fortunate enough for her dreams to come true if she truly believes in them.